Expectations have killed me. Well, not just yet, but I am definitely getting close. When I was younger, I had some rather stupid, naive expectations of being with somebody, who herself embodied truth and purity. That was a long time ago. However, I still think it makes sense to expect the best.
On a similar note, earlier my career expectations actually meant something to me. A vision that I would be working in international development, travelling the world, and doing something important.
Now, I am a) still single, having lived just a couple of less than successful relationships; and b) working in manual labour position that requires less than a high school education which puts me just under the poverty line with a sentiment of guilt of state inherited debt for the time I spent in post-secondary education. Even if my salary were to be doubled, I look at my colleagues and have a great doubt of what I can and will be achieving.
A few paragraphs of self pity doesn't do me any good, but it begs me to think what this world would be like if people gave up doing shitty jobs, or jobs that are not as valued as others. ( I personally know that everything is important, but am aware that there are activities that are less constructive, such as marketing or the production of consumer waste products like packaging or unhealthy foods, gadgets etc.)
Knowing that the for the greatest part of history, the majority of the population lived through poverty and hunger, yet they retained a will to live. It baffles and inspires me.
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